I have decided that the "Blogs of Note" section on the main page

of blogger.com is filled predominately with blogs wherein ugly people type meaningless thoughts. The difference in mine? I'm a beautiful man.

Edit: Sound the alarm. I've used the word "blog" 3 times in one sentence. And now, 4 times in one post.

There are so many crazy people at libraries

As a dude who spends a decent amount of time at public libraries, I can tell you that there are some crazy ass people who spend their time there. (Get all your "YOU'RE CRAZY TOO" jokes out of the way, now.) For the most part, they are respectful of the rest of us in the library and are quietly crazy. Yesterday however, I was not so lucky.

I was sitting, minding my own business while doing some research for work, when a crazy lady sat down next to me on my left, muttering something like "the books are always wrong." I shifted to my right.

Five minutes later, a crazy man sat down in front of me, speaking at about an outdoor volume, alternating between grunts of disgust and exclamations about how he "can't believe this!"

Not a minute after that, another crazy man walked into the room and began yelling at bookshelves.

I left shortly thereafter.

So what if it's 9/9/09

The whole stupid world is buzzing about this "anomaly." "It's 9/9/09! All the numbers match! Etc. etc. etc.!" Yeah. It's happened before. It'll happen again. I didn't hear everyone freaking out about 8/8/08, last year.

Those same jerks probably get excited when the clock hits 10:10 twice a day, too.

Blog's back and I'm still bugged

I watched this guy go into a restaurant with his wife and two kids. Doesn't sound too annoying right off, but here's the thing: Dude never took off his sunglasses. At no point during this meal (taken indoors, mind you) did he feel it was acceptable to take off his douche-y, Euro-trash sunglasses. Awesome.

A normal man pulling this stunt would be considered an ass (in my opinion, at least), but a man with his wife and two kids present deserves a gold medal for ass-baggery. Props to his wife for being supportive of his condition. Without her, this all wouldn't have been possible.

P.S. Yes, ass-baggery might be new to the English language. Bonus points for coming up with an appropriate definition.

P.P.S. Yes, it's been almost a year since my last entry. Shut up.

Seriously, everyone

Standing in large groups in the middle of the stairwell might be OK with you, but it's extremely inconvenient for the rest of us who are trying to get to class. Move your asses to the common areas or AT LEAST to the hallways. You'll make it through life with much less dirty looks thrown your way.

Let's talk about dating law students

I can understand someone who doesn't go to law school making this mistake but WOW when someone in law school dates another person in law school...it's like they're trying to breed assholes. Just the thought of another arrogant, know-it-all, cutthroat bastard out there makes me cringe. Law students, you've got to ask yourself, "Do I really want to date a male/female version of me?" Please. The only thing more annoying than a law student is a 2-pack of law students walking around giggling and talking about the funny thing you read in your Con Law textbook. End of rant.

What the hell did they teach you in kindergarten?

FYI: The thing where people raise their hand, with the back of their hand facing the professor, to be called on during class? Bugs the shit out of me.

Tips on how to interact in class - Lesson 1

You don’t need to preface every statement made in class with “I was just gonna say…” Just say it. We'll get that you're "just gonna say it" when you say it. And while we're on that note, shut up after you make your statement. We don't need your life story.

Seriously.

People who ride bicycles, roll up your pant leg after you get off of your bike. You look like a douche.

Things that bug me.

Pubes in the urinals. (Sorry, ladies. You'll have to sit this one out.)

I go into the bathroom and there's pubes in the urinals. What's the f'ing deal, here? How does this come about? I've got my theories:

1) It's the work of a religious nut. There is a guy who, every time he pees, pulls out his pubes as if to atone for his past sins. This guy is relentless, pulling out at least 10 in any giving sitting. He then leaves them in the urinal to remind himself of his past crimes.

2) Some dude has problems unzipping. John Q. Longpubes can't unzip and pull out his junk without inadvertently ripping out his own body hair. He is too stunned to do anything with them but leave them where they fall. Do yourself a favor and give yourself a trim.

3) It's a terrible present. Just as your dog or cat will drag a dead bird into the house as a "gift" to you, this man leaves his pubes in the urinal as work of art for all to see. 20 years down the road, it turns out that he's the new Van Gogh.

4) God hates me. He knows that seeing ripped-out pubes in a public urinal will always make me gag. He divinely intervenes to set me up.

Seriously, now guys. How hard is it to keep your pubes to yourself? Work it out.